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What is self esteem, and how can I start to improve it today?

The dictionary describes self esteem as ‘a realistic respect for or favourable impression of oneself; self-respect’ BUT it also describes it as ‘an inordinately or exaggeratedly favourable impression of oneself’ So even the dictionary can offer us a rather confusing impression of what self esteem really means. This is one of the reasons I believe as a society, we have become confused and often mistake self esteem for ‘self importance – which can be off putting and damaging in relationships, leading to an excessive need for admiration and lack of empathy towards other people.’ The key (as always) is balance. Finding a happy place where your self esteem serves you and your life. 

Self esteem; self worth; self respect; self understanding; self love; self acceptance; self care; self discipline; and self talk.

When we are equipped with the knowledge of all of the above – the relationship that we have with ourselves can truly be the best relationship we experience in our lives! I would however just like to mention that having HEALTHY SELF ESTEEM is the most important thing that I can teach you! With it, you can genuinely achieve greatness! Without it, I have seen people struggle to keep consistency and bring longevity into their achievements. Mastering ‘self’ in all of the above areas – is one of my keys to success.

“Too little self-esteem can leave people feeling defeated or depressed. It can also lead people to make bad choices, fall into destructive relationships, or fail to live up to their full potential.” One of my favourite ‘truths’ is how your relationships with others – can often mirror the relationship that you have within yourself. Sometimes, this is a hard pill to swallow – but for those truly wanting to become masters of themselves, the swallow occurs! 

Negative cyclic behaviour is an indication that low self esteem is lurking. If every relationship (romantic or otherwise) tends to end the same way i.e all of your partners cheat on you, your friendships do not last a very long time, you rely on the validation of others to feel ‘good’ or you feel like you give a lot but get nothing in return, these are just a few examples that your self esteem is due for an MOT!

Give yourself a self esteem MOT

Maslov’s Hierarchy of needs [4] depicts Self Esteem as one of the basic human motivations and of huge importance when it comes to goal accomplishment, which is why in PowerBurn – self esteem is a big player when it comes to how your PowerCoach will coach you to success. 

Understanding the signs of low self esteem and when to go in ‘for a service’. 

  • You focus on your weaknesses
  • You frequently experience feelings such as shame, depression, or anxiety
  • You have a negative outlook on life
  • You have an intense fear of failure
  • You have trouble accepting positive feedback
  • You have trouble saying “no”
  • You put other people’s needs before your own
  • You struggle with confidence
  • You find it difficult expressing your needs
  • You believe that others are better than you [5]

My first suggestion to you, if you tick any of the above boxes, would be to book in for a PowerChat with one of our amazing PowerCoaches – so that you can start putting a support structure together and build a new healthy self esteem house. Exercise and nutrition really are highly important and great ways to boost your self esteem, but are only 2 parts of how we create the best version of you. Join our PowerBurn community today for a free class and you can start your journey to feeling better.

My top 5 things to start improving your self esteem today

  1. Listen to your Self Talk and write it down. Clarify whether or not it is absolutely 100% TRUE all of the time or if it is things that are not true that you keep telling yourself. This brings it out of the mind and into a place where it can become a working document.
  2. Be kind. This is not just a popular hashtag – it is an action that can change lives – especially YOUR OWN! Start treating yourself as your own best friend and do one kind thing for yourself each day until it becomes habitual.
  3. Write down a list of all of your strengths and accomplishments – however big or small they may be. Even if you managed to put your bins out 2 weeks in a row… write that down. If this seems impossible – write down your best friend or lovers strengths. Then see if you can identify with them too.
  4. Become your own cheerleader. Catch yourself every time you call yourself a name. If you drop something on the floor and call yourself an idiot, immediately respond with – Ok, so it was unfortunate I dropped it – but it is not true I am an idiot. Today I choose to be kind to myself and replace ‘idiot’ with a much kinder word.
  5. I AM ENOUGH! Write this on your mirror, on a sticky note on your computer, put it in your wallet and have it stuck on the fridge. Read it when you brush your teeth, comb your hair, are in the kitchen and pay for things… It is life changing. I am enough. I am enough. I am enough. It is a great foundation to grow from!

7 Days of Self Love

You’ve made it this far and we want to offer you something that our paying customers to go through as part of our PowerBurn Online program. We have our very own exclusive 7 days of self love course. You can sign up for it here and get started on day one as soon as the email alongside online videos help you along the way.

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